Trivia and Quotes
Quotes
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Myles: Dorian, you can keep begging until Lil` Kim comes out with a gospel album. It ain`t gonna happen.
Hakeem: Niecy, your village called, and they miss their idiot.
Moesha: Aren`t you having a good time?
David: Yeah, but if we go to my house, we can have a GREAT time. Know what I`m sayin`?
Moesha: [puzzled look] No.
David: I`m talkin` about gratitude, girl! Shoot, I paid twenty dollars for those tickets!
Moesha: [jaw drops]
David: Hey, don`t act like you never been on a date before!
Moesha: David, what happened? I thought you were nice.
David: Why have nice... when you can have NASTY? I`m good, baby. Check my references. Pick up the phone, dial randomly, and if a woman answers the phone, ask her about me.
Moesha: David, you handled him really well! Have you ever thought about doing stand-up?
David: I AM standing up.
[about school newspaper]
Kim: Well actually, I kinda like what Taylor did for the fashion section. She put my picture on the front page.
Niecy: Yeah, as a "fashion don`t".
Kim: Girl, nobody ever *reads* the paper.
[recurring line throughout the series, usually scaring everyone after being said]
Hakeem: Boom!
[Moesha has missed a surprise party for Andell at the Mitchell home]
Kim: What happened, Mo, did you forget where you live?
Kim: Y`all are dysfun... Y`all are dysfun... Y`all can`t get along.
[about Kim`s weight]
Kim: It`s just baby fat.
Taylor: No, it`s just fat, baby.
Aaron: Come on, Mo, I never said I was a virgin.
Moesha: No, but I didn`t know you were a ho!
Moesha: My name is Moesha Mitchell.
Morris Day: Oh, Lawd, another "Esha" baby.
Sara: [gathering pennies] Andell, if we split a Cherry Soda, can we still get the free refills?
Andell Wilkerson: No, Broke-ahontas.
Kim: I wanna get my knowledge on, you know, like that commercial say, "A mind is a terrible thing."
Niecy: Mo, we have looked everywhere: the arcade, the Magic Johnson theater, Mickey D`s playland, the swap meet...
Kim: Yeah, and I got 10 scrunchies for a dollar!
Moesha: Kim, my brother is missing and you`re shopping?
Kim: Well, if we can`t find him we can use them as armbands.
Dee Mitchell: I`m not getting any younger, your father and I are very much in love and we want to have a baby.
Moesha: But you already got us.
Dee Mitchell: And you`re such a joy we want one more.
Moesha: I don`t look like Brandy! I`m cuter than her.
Cop: Calm down.
Frank Mitchell: Don`t you tell me to calm down, I pay your salary!
Cop: Then I need a raise.
Andell Wilkerson: Baby? After all the free advice I been slinging around here?
Moesha: Not me, Andell, my parents.
Andell Wilkerson: Whew, girl, I thought I was gonna have to regulate.
Niecy: I`m watching my figure.
Myles: Then maybe you can tell the rest of us where to look for it.
Moesha: You know I can dance like Janet.
Niecy: Yup - Reno.
Quinton "Q" Brooks: [about Channing] That brotha`s a teacher? Dang, who`s head of the English department? Foxy Brown?
Kim: [shouts] Hello, Myles. How are you doing?
Niecy: Kim, you don`t have to shout. He`s not deaf. He`s just a little touched.
Hakeem: He`s not touched! He just likes to get high.
Hakeem: I`m going to ask Jennifer Lopez on a date.
Moesha: Oh, so you just beggin` to get tackled by security, huh?
Hakeem: When she sees me, she`ll take care of security.
Moesha: Yup, I can hear her now - "Get him!"
Frank Mitchell: You see, we got into a bidding war for the dealership.
Dee Mitchell: Are we talking desert storm or Star Wars?
Myles: [Frank has spent $75,000 on the dealership] Looks like it`s back to picking lemons.
Moesha: Lemons? You better make that cotton.
Niecy: Hola, chico.
Antonio: Oh, and Happy Kwanzaa, my sista!
Moesha: The Mitchells are your typical middle-class family. Lots of laughs, lots of hugs, lots of love.
Dr. Woods: Lots of drama.
Kim: [handing out free samples] Chicken, get yo` chicken here. Chicken. Free chicken. Half off the free chicken!
Hakeem: You should`ve seen it - Ms. Parker set old Fullmore straight.
Niecy: Ms. Parker, can you come to my trig class? Mr. Johnson is getting out of hand.
Nikki Parker: I don`t care if he runs amok - Nikki don`t do trig.
Moesha: Niecy, which Tae-Bo tape is this?
Niecy: Oh, girl, those tapes are too expensive. This is Tae-Po.
Dorian Long: All right, lil` man, Frisky is gonna need a walk before I get back.
Myles: Where are you going?
Dorian Long: To a Hallowe`en party.
Myles: Well, you better go as a kangaroo and put that dog in your pouch, `cuz I ain`t the one.
Myles: I want to get a job.
Moesha: Now Myles, you know the circus is *not* in town.
Hakeem: What`s up, Jetsons!
Frank Mitchell: Jetsons?
Hakeem: Yeah, you and George got the same haircut.
Andell Wilkerson: I think you need to reconsider that decision.
Moesha: Why? Me and The Den Think Tank have already discussed it.
Kim: Yeah, we done already moved to the refreshment part of this agenda.
Kim: You know, why are you always playing so hard-to-get?
Hakeem: I`m not playing!
Dee Mitchell: Myles, you better get a move on if you want a ride to school.
Moesha: Oh, I`ll walk him.
Myles: "Walk me"? Do I look like a dog to you?
Kim: Who is baby?
Moesha: That`s just Hakeem!
Kim: Hakeem? Well, the brotha must`ve stepped into a phone booth or *somethin`*.
Kim: So what does Ohagi mean? Young Black God?
Ohagi: It means Conquering Warrior.
Kim: Ooh, I surrender.
Kim: [Moesha shows up at The Den after being grounded] What`s up, Shawshank? I thought you were doing five to ten.
Moesha: Listen to this resume I wrote for Hakeem.
Kim: Okay.
Moesha: Hakeem Campbell: Crenshaw High honor student.
Kim: Honor student? Maybe honorary.
Frank Mitchell: [after Dee begins complaining in a Jamaican accent] Now you got her island up.
Kim: Excuse me, Madame Fifi! But you blocking my view of Chocolate Thunder!
Taylor: It looks to me like you`ve had enough chocolate.
Trivia
There are four different versions of the theme song.
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