Trivia and Quotes
Quotes
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Julian: But after my nap I always watch the Kangaroo Song.
Sonny: It`s overtime right now and there`s a penalty shot about to take place. This happens about once every ten years so...
Julian: Kangaroo song, kangaroo song, kangaroo song, KANGAROO SONG!
Sonny: ALLLRRIIIGGGHTT! God you were normal yesterday!
Sonny: Having a kid is great... as long as his eyes are closed and he`s not moving or speaking.
[Discussing Vanessa`s new senior citizen boyfriend]
Vanessa: He has a five year plan.
Sonny: What is it? "Don`t die"?
Layla: So two guys you were best friends with in law school fell in love with each other?
Sonny: Yeah.
Layla: Is that strange for you?
Sonny: Uh, nothing changed really. They watch a different kind of porno now.
[Music playing in the background]
Layla: This is Styx.
Sonny: Yeah.
Layla: They`ve been my favorite band since I was, like, twelve.
Sonny: You`re kidding me?
Layla: No, no, I can`t help it, I just love them. My friends make fun of me all the time.
Sonny: My friends make fun of me all the time, too. I`ve seen them, like, twenty-five times. Tommy Shaw, when I was, like, sixteen years old, I was at the concert, he actually reached out and grabbed my hand, pulled me up on stage, and I got to do the robot voice for Mr. Roboto!
Sonny: I had a mother lined up for him, but she`s bangin` the Pepperidge Farm guy and the kid won`t stop peeing and throwing up, he`s like a cocker spaniel.
Sonny: Don`t worry about me making money. I`m in love with a woman who makes plenty of it. She`ll be my sugar mamma.
Homeless Guy: I gotta get me one of those.
Sonny: Hey, the money I won in the cab accident is kicking ass in the stockmarket, so relax!
[Ordering food]
Sonny: Julian, what do you want?
Julian: Thirty packets of ketchup.
Sonny: I`m going through a rough patch in my life right now. Syracuse is 0 and 3. I got those medical problems.
Vanessa: Medical problems? A cab runs over your foot 2 years ago, you spend one night in the hospital.
Sonny: First of all that cab was huge. And a jury decided that one night of pain was worth two hundred thousand dollars, so there ya go.
Sonny: Hey, stay away from the frozen food section, Corinne! Your boobs`ll harden.
Corinne: What`s this I hear about you doing laundry with my sister?
Sonny: Did she say we were doing laundry? Because where I come from, it`s called "doing the hibbidy-dibbidy."
Sonny: Congratulations! You and "Big Boobs" McGee are gonna get along just fine.
Kevin: Don`t call her "Big Boobs" McGee.
Sonny: You`re going to explain to your kids that you met their mother while she was waitressing at Hooters?
Kevin: Sonny that was five years ago! She`s a doctor now, and my fiance. So from now on, Dr. "Big Boobs" McGee.
[Sonny is dressed up as Scuba Sam]
Sonny: Hi, Julian! How ya doin`? I`m Scuba Sam, Scuba Steve`s father. You see, my boy needs to take a bath, the only problem is he`s afraid to bathe alone. So, I was wondering if you`d keep him company in the tub.Terrific, and after your bath, you need to try and study hard because if you want to be in the Scuba Squad, you have to be smart.
Julian: I can be in the Scuba Squad?
Sonny: Well sure! All you have to do is work hard and don`t tell a soul about the Scuba Squad because then everybody`s gonna wanna join! Oh, and one more thing! Be nice to the Delivery Guy, will ya? It`s not his fault he can`t read.
Corinne: We wasted the good surprise on you!
Sonny: Say "Happy Halloween".
Reluctant Trick-or-Treat Giver: Happy Halloween.
Sonny: Yeah, next year be prepared!
Homeless Guy: Sonny was real nice to the kid. Wish my father was like him. My father was a military man. Guess I wasn`t such a good soldier. Anyways, when I was 35, he tried to give me a crew cut while I was asleep. I woke up, broke his arm, haven`t seen him since. I`d rather live in a dumpster then under his freaky ass rules! (Notices a McDonald`s bag in Sonny`s hand) Anyways, I think Sonny Koufax should be acquitted of all the charges. If O.J. can get away with murder, why can`t Sonny have his kid? (points at a black man) This guy knows what I`m talking about! No more questions!
Ted Castellucci: Objection, Your Honor! The court is interested in the truth, not the opinion of the defendant`s father.
Lenny: You want my opinion? My son is a moron.
Ted Castellucci: I withdraw my objection. Please proceed!
[Julian is taking a leak]
Julian: How come you`re not going?
Sonny: Because I don`t have to go. Only you and my grandfather go every thirty seconds.
[Julian and the Delivery Guy are learning how to read]
Julian: Electricity! Constitution! Philadelphia!
Nazo: Fish! Pony! Hip, Hip Hop, Hip Hop anonymous? Damn you! You gave him the easy ones.
Julian: ...but I wipe my own ass, I wipe my own ass!
Julian: I wipe my own ass.
Nazo: Me too.
Sonny: Hey! You just made the biggest mistake of your life, baby. I know you`re gunna be missing me when you have that big, white, wrinkly body on you with his loose skin and old balls... gross! Ugh!
Sonny: I got some interesting news?
Lenny: Oh yeah, what?
Sonny: I kind of adopted a kid
Lenny: What the hell are you talking about?
Sonny: I`m talking about you becoming a grandfather! Congratulations!
Lenny: Who the hell would give you a kid?
Sonny: Social Services.
Lenny: You idiot! You better give that kid back!
Sonny: His mother`s... hang on, hang on.
[shouts at Julian, from afar]
Sonny: *Go play with them pigeons, buddy!* I tried to give him back. I just, I just, I just can`t, Dad. I need your help. I`m in a bad way right now, Vanessa dumped me, I don`t know what the hell I`m doing!
Lenny: You damn right you don`t know what the hell you doing!
[discussing Julian`s doll Scuba Steve]
Nazo: I had doll like that once. But my cat, he bite his head off!
Julian: What kind of cat would do that?
Nazo: You calling me a liar?
Sonny: [after Julien kills a bunch of pigeons with a sling shot] Let me have that. Go to your room... I guess. Or go do whatever you want.
[at McDonald`s]
Sonny: Okay, what do you want?
Julian: Cheerios.
Sonny: Cheerios? They don`t got Cheerios. What else?
Julian: Lasagna.
Sonny: Lasagna? What the hell is the matter with you? Um, we`ll take hot cakes and sausage...
Employee: Sorry, sir, we stopped serving breakfast.
Sonny: What are you talking about? We`re FOUR seconds late.
Employee: No, you`re 30 minutes and four seconds late. We stopped serving breakfast at 10:30.
Sonny: Aw, HORSESHIT!
Julian: [after jumping around frantically to the Kangaroo song, Julian suddenly stops]
Sonny: Aww, what`s wrong, are you all hopped out?
Julian: [Julian suddenly throws up all the junk food he has been eating all over the floor]
Sonny: What do you eat?
Julian: Food.
Sonny: Oh yea? Well I eat food too.
Mr. Herlihy: Goddamn Jets!
Waitress: Hey, cutie! What are you doing here?
Julian: Watching football.
Waitress: Oh yea, who do you want to win?
Julian: The Goddamn Jets.
Sonny: [steps on Julian`s Scuba Steve Doll] Ow, Scuba Steve! Damn You!
Sonny: Man this Yoohoo is good, you know what else is good, smoking dope. I ain`t gonna rat you out. You know, puffing the cheeba, go by the see saw smoke a j. You know what I`m talking about?
Jared: I have a belly button.
Sonny: You have a belly button, well we all have belly buttons. You know what? We all love Yoohoo, especially Yoohoo with a little rum.
Jared: What`s rum?
Sonny: You don`t know what Rum is?
Jared: Rumplestilskin?
Sonny: Rumplestilskin`s a good man. So are you guys. Hey, stay clean, stay focused, stay strong. Frankenstein, have fun with your friends.
Sonny: Where`s Kevin?
Corinne: Oh, he already left. He forgot to say goodbye to you.
Sonny: Then why are you here?
Corinne: I`m cleaning because you`re useless.
Sonny: Then are you going to go to your Hooters reunion? And talk about who`s ass sticks out the most while wearing your shorts?
Corinne: At least I can fit my ass in to my shorts, fatty.
Sonny: [Taking out leftover food from fridge] Speaking of fatty, whose is this?
Corinne: I don`t know.
Sonny: I`m eating it then.
[Sonny is on the stand at the custody hearing for Julian]
Tommy: [stands up] Objection!
Lenny: Shut up, Tommy!
Tommy: [sits down] Sorry, Mr. Koufax.
Julian: [pointing to Vanessa`s older lover] Sonny, is that the man with the old balls?
Sonny: What`s your name, he`ll write it on the wall... mind your business!
Sonny: [Julian is bouncing up and down in front of the TV on a rubber ball] Hey.
Julian: Hey!
Sonny: You like hockey?
Julian: You like hockey?
Sonny: This is a big, important game.
Julian: This is a big, important game!
Sonny: Cut the crap.
Julian: Cut the crap!
Sonny: I`m being serious, don`t do that.
Julian: I;m being serious, don`t do that!
Sonny: [quickly] How much wood would a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
Julian: [stops bouncing]
Sonny: That`s what I thought. Shut up.
[Julian resumes bouncing in front of the TV]
Sonny: That was your girlfriend. She`s Hooterific again.
Customer: [while Jullian is crying] Nice parenting.
Sonny: Hey, thanks! Who are you? My therapist?
[tosses the guy`s fries over his shoulder]
Sonny: Take a walk!
Sonny: Everyone`s so busy with their crap lately, no one ever comes.
Mr. Herlihy: Like I`m not busy?
Sonny: Hey Mr. Herlihy, how bout you shut up before i smack you threw the wall like last week?
Mr. Herlihy: Last Monday was a fluke. Bring it on woman. Oh... hah... hahahahahahaha
Sonny: He drinks alot of soda.
Mr. Herlihy: Koufax is a good egg, he was nice to that kid. But he fights like a girl. You like that? I`m right here Miss, what are you gonna do about it? Hahaha.
Sonny: What are you drunk Mr. Herlihy?
Mr. Herlihy: Well, I-I had a few chardonnays, what of it?
Sonny: Get off the stand please.
Mr. Herlihy: You got it. Got a few problems.
Sonny: I`m thinkin` about keepin` the kid.
Phil D`Amato: Sonny, remember that time you went with me to the pet store to get fish food and you saw that cute little puppy and you wanted to get it, but then I reminded you about feeding it and cleaning it and toilet-training it?
Sonny: Yeah...
Phil D`Amato: Well, this is kinda like that - except with a human!
Trivia
Cole Sprouse and Dylan Sprouse both lost baby teeth during production and had to be fitted with temporary replacements. Dylan Sprouse`s tooth fell out in the middle of a take. Near the end of the movie, just after entering Hooters for his birthday, Sonny makes a reference to Julian about dealing with a missing tooth.
In the courtroom scene, Mr. Brooks` attorney is named Ted Castelucci. This is also the name of the film`s composer, Teddy Castellucci.
The "Scuba Steve" action figure in this movie is a fictional doll made up by Adam Sandler. "Scuba Steve" is based on a doll that Adam Sandler owned when he was a child, called Diver Dan. Diver Dan can be seen briefly in the intro scenes of another Dennis Dugan film, Problem Child (1990).
*
* Arthur Brooks is named after Adam Sandler`s producer Brooks Arthur, who produced all of Sandler`s albums as well as the score for this movie.
Allen Covert has appeared in fourteen Adam Sandler films.
Adam Sandler provided the voice of the rollerblader who fell over a stick and yells "Goddamn stick!"
The movie that Sonny and Julian have a good time watching is Young Frankenstein (1974).
Co-writer Tim Herlihy appears as the singing kangaroo in Julian`s favorite video, singing the "Kangaroo Song".
The video-game that is being played in Sonny`s apartment is Twisted Metal III (1998) (VG).
Director Cameo: [Dennis Dugan] the guy unprepared for Halloween.
Director Cameo: [Dennis Dugan] On the boat behind Columbo; and the reluctant treat giver.
Adam Sandler`s wife, Jackie Sandler (Jackie Titone), plays the waitress in the bar that gets Julian a root beer. This was her first movie with her husband.
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Adam Sandler
(as Sonny Koufax)
with Kristy Swanson
(as Vanessa)
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