Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn`t work out, you haven`t wasted a whole day.

You always pass failure on the way to success.

I think the family pictures are what people really want to see - and musicals, of course. (2007)

If it`s immorally wrong, it`s not normal. Jesus Christ said the effeminate are an abomination to me. Are you aware of that? I don`t watch the Ellen show. I wish her all kinds of luck. Except that I`m not a fan. But there are a lot of people who aren`t fans of Mickey Rooney and you can`t please everyone.

[On his Feud with Ernest Borgnine]: All the Oscars in the world can`t buy him dignity, class, and talent. I don`t know why he is famous and why he is a star. Talk about a lucky jerk.

I`ve been through four publics. I`ve been coming back like a rubber ball for years.

All the muddy waters of my life cleared up when I gave myself to Christ.

I just want to be a professional. I couldn`t live without acting.

I didn`t ask to be short. I didn`t want to be short. I`ve tried to pretend that being a short guy didn`t matter.

On his life-long friend and frequent co-star, Judy Garland: "Judy turned to drugs because she was in pain and because drugs made her feel good. As one of the MGM kids, she`d been treated for most of her life to magical, instant, solutions to everything...She could never accept herself so she was always on the run."

Upon winning his lifetime achievement Oscar, 1983: "Tonight, I could even kiss Louis B. Mayer!"

I was a 14-year-old boy for 30 years.

I don`t regret anything I`ve ever done. I only wish I could have done more.

Love wears off too quickly.

Had I been brighter, the ladies been gentler, the Scotch weaker, the gods kinder, the dice hotter - it might have all ended up in a one-sentence story.

The audience and I are friends. They allowed me to grow up with them. I`ve let them down several times. They`ve let me down several times. But we`re all family.

You`ve got to recognize, there will never be another you. It has nothing to do with ego; it happens to be the truth. There will never be another person the same. There`ll never be another you. There`ll never be another me... And there`ll never be another show like this!

On his marriages: "When I say I do, the Justice of the Peace replies, `I know, I know.` I`m the only man in the world whose marriage license reads, `To Whom it May Concern.` But to have been married eight times is not normal. That`s only half-way intelligent."

People say, `How can you be married eight times?` But I played the hand dealt me the way I was supposed to. I was friendly with most of my ex-wives. My God, there`s a Mickey Rooney`s Former Wives Marching Band!

My partners weren`t what we call in horse racing parlance routers. They were sprinters; they went out of the gate, but then they stopped. They couldn`t go the distance.

Would he marry all those women again? "Absolutely. I loved every one of them."

"I`m in pretty good shape for the shape I`m in." - Mickey Rooney at 58